Parents must learn how to handle their children who play sports and they need to understand a bit of sports psychology. In considering this I found an interesting essay on Sports Psychology, below are a few statements taken out of that text that should be further addressed.
For instance on the issue of which sport or team activity the child should be involved, here is a notable comment:
“Parents should educate themselves about sports in which their children express interest. In addition, they should support their child’s decision to drop out of a sport.”
Do we really believe that parents should support their kids quitting? I mean life is tough and if a kid gets use to quitting, he’ll do it more often. What about the quote “winners never quit and quitters never win” or the one on perseverance or Winston Churchill’s famous speech “never, ever, ever, ever…ever give up?” These are very wise quotes; do any of us deny that? Still, the author and sports psychology author answers in the paper:
“The notion that allowing a child to drop out of a sport teaches him or her to be a quitter is a myth. No evidence suggests that allowing youth to leave a sport in which they are unhappy leads to problems with commitment later.”
I’ve read papers supporting this argument, but I feel as if they do not necessarily hold true in the real world. I’ve noted many quitters in my life in business, and these same people are quitters in life too, marriages, family, business, jobs, etc. I think this would require more scrutiny also.
Other sports psychologist we talked to tell us that:
“We should teach kids to have fun, play fair, and not to win until after age 12 or so”
Indeed, I would submit that there is nothing wrong with winning at any age. Yes, play fair; that goes without saying, but winning is why you do it. If you don’t want to win, then don’t play, because this ruins it for the children that are serious, no one wants someone on the team that will not pull their weight, as a chain is only as strong as its weakest link.
Kids that are Winners often want to quit team sports because no one else is trying as hard as them then when the team loses and they played their best, it upsets them. I can recall the only season I hated in soccer was on a team that allowed every player to play the exact amount of time, even kids that were no good. We lost all but one game that season, I never wanted to play again; it took me nearly a year to get over it until I was ready to play team soccer again.
Many of these social scientists and children sports psychologists write papers with very good graphics, formatting, good use of white space and bulleted lists. Still, we must challenge their advice, their papers, and essays to parents. Some of it is relevant and worthy, but I do not understand what on Earth they have against winners.
Here me when I say it and never forget this: There is nothing wrong with winning. Quite frankly, I am getting quite tired of apologizing for winning all the time, especially to those who do not try. Think on this.
Lance Winslow – Lance Winslow’s Bio. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; http://www.WorldThinkTank.net/.
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